From WordPress to Youtube

 The pilgrimage from words to mp4 has been a long time coming, and just as I’ve physically switched coasts in the US, I have also switched gears in the content I want to produce online.

At first, the desire to start making videos was very foreign and unnerving. This wouldn’t be something that came naturally or be an easy transition. Alas, I could not put down the feeling that this was the next step for me, and so I am here to present to you my newly launched channel, Metanoia.

 

Just as it was difficult for me to get used to the idea of trying to launch a channel, it was difficult to make the first video and try to verbally explain where I’m coming from and where I’d like to go with this new chapter.

I have spent the past few months beating myself up for not writing any blog posts and for not making any progress with my manuscript. Although it’s still discouraging, I have realized that there may be a good reason I can’t seem to get my mind on anything other than making videos. Perhaps simply going with what one feels naturally inclined to do in creative endeavors is the right way to go about it. Perhaps I have been too militant with word counts, with attempting to write my story in chronological order rather than in pieces, with churning out a blog post every week, or every month even. Where is the room for growth and letting a creation become something greater than a systematic ensemble?

   It is at this juncture that I’m entertaining the possibility that making videos at this time may be necessary for my growth as a writer, or for the person I’m becoming. After all, there is a lot that I am learning from this change of pace, and is also leading me to make a lot of new connections.

  So, if you’ve enjoyed this blog so far and would like to continue this journey with me, this is where you can find me in the foreseeable future. The thought of not producing any content on my blog still irks me and so I will be jumping on the first chance I get to write. But for now, this is where I’m called to.

 

 

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Conquering Writer’s Block Through the Use of Alternative Creative Outlets

   A lot of my followers are creative individuals. This has encouraged me to write a short piece on my own methods of maintaining an expressive lifestyle.

   I have found several pursuits that help me think when I’m in a rut, or experience an obstacle in my writing. For everyone, this distraction will be something different. I am only sharing what works for me, and perhaps it’s something strange that you haven’t considered or might like to try. I’ve incorporated these activities into my daily routine, and have found that I experience less blockages because of it. I’ve never considered myself an artist, but refocusing my attention on drawing, oracle cards, gardening or painting keeps me in a receptive state while also distracting myself from the problem at hand.

Its all about keeping the flow going while taking your mind off the problem. I don’t really care so much about what I’m creating as I am about making something, anything. I draw when I see something and want to learn the nuances of its definition. I paint when I want to feel and experiment with colors and textures. I pull a card from an oracle or tarot deck when I want to reach out to the universe or my subconscious.

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Oracle cards are a visual and tactile way to connect and to be receptive. Although they are a way to physically connect with something for those who are spiritually curious, oracle cards can also serve as an awesome writing prompt. Not just because of their thought-provoking images, but because of the insight of their messages. They might spark a realization that you couldn’t come to on your own. You may also find a consistency in the messages, and feel compelled to learn and share it. Thats how my recent post The Utility of Doubt, Lethargy, and Other Perceived Negatives came about.

Although I already have a story in progress and have not had the need to do this yet, here is an example of a Tarot writing prompt:

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1. Character; 2. Setting; 3.Underlying Motivation; 4. Conflict; 5. Pathway; 6. Outcome

In addition to forming outlines, this method can be used for character development and specific scenes.

Even coloring can be a simple distraction. If you are a writer, reading helps collect tools for your creative toolbox whilst remaining in the realm of words.

When all else fails, take a walk at an inspiring location and listen to some music.

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Creating for the sake of creating is one of the most empowering activities we can do. As any creative will tell you, the mere act of manifestation is the most fulfilling aspect of the process. It brings you back to yourself, your center. You learn how to draw from an internal pool of infinite creation and possibilities. It can be a visceral experience at times. I often imagine having to pull what I want to make from my own heart or mind, and channeling it based on intention. It brings you back into your power in a world where we normally just let things happen to us, rather than taking control of what we want to make happen. You go back to a place where you feel confident enough to create whatever is meant to be created despite what the ego is trying to manifest, or the direction it wants to steer you in.

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Photo Credited to DELA

New Pages – Playlist for Writers!

For this week’s post, I would like to introduce two new pages that I added to my site. I have a variety of followers that come from several different backgrounds, but many tend to be fellow writers. For this reason, I wish to share something that is an indispensable part of my creative process. I have made a ‘Playlists for Writers’ page with songs that have been particularly helpful for me, and might be beneficial to you, whether it’s for writing or any other kind of creative work. Here is an example of a playlist that you can find on my page:

I’ve also added a page for anyone who would like to support me and my writing. There you can find a banner to sign up for Inboxdollars, an easy way to make some cash online. There is also a link to Thrive Market, an online store for those who want organic food at a price that falls within their budget. Signing up through either of these links will help to feed me, and to raise money for the illustrations that I need professionally done for my novel.

This might be the last post for a while, as I have a wedding and road trip planned for next week. I hope everyone has a lovely week and fulfilling weekend!

 

 

 

Who Are We?

   I cleaned out from under my bed today. Everything under there was from elementary school (somehow, at age 22). It seems as though I was quick to throw away middle school, but not so much my elementary years. I can recall having a fulfilling 5th grade. I had 3 best friends, one of which was in my class. Even though life got strange at times, I felt capable despite insecurities and obstacles. Right after that, all three friends moved, my muse died (I was a creative kid), and I distinctly remember going into every department store and finding nothing that would fit me, a metaphor for the times.

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I was a better artist at 10 than I am now apparently.

   Despite having a fond recollection, I look back and I feel detached from this person. I cannot connect to the photos or memories, although they are still strong and clear in my mind. I’ve never been one to dwell on the past, “It distracts from the now” as Edna from The Incredibles famously stated.

   Several weeks before this mass removal of childhood paraphernalia, I found myself dwelling on the little known fact that all the atoms in our body are recycled every 7 years or so. It was a topic I naturally gravitated towards given my recent checkpoint in life. We are not made up of the same composition we had when we were born. Everything was replaced, and deposited somewhere to maintain a general form. In this sense, we do not have the same exact makeup when we were seven either, or during our favorite adolescent memories compared to now. Even the expression of our DNA can alter slightly when environmental cues turn certain genes on and off  (This is called epigenetics in science. In a spiritual sense of ascension, it is called DNA activation).

   For me, there is this disconnect, and relation existing simultaneously. It’s as if it is already a past life, with a line of consciousness connecting all physical states of being, holding them together. Coincidentally, my Uncle sent me a quote from James Gleick he thought I’d like that pertains to all of this. It states “Mind must be a sort of dynamical pattern, not so much founded in a neurological substrate as floating above it, independent of it.”

Perhaps past lives are like that when we die and finally remember what we are. Although these past character states used to be our most recent self at one point, we moved on and no longer associate it with our compete identity. Perhaps our identity is more of what we are now and where we are going than what has happened to us and what we previously experienced.

Who are we, or perhaps, what are we? Just a thought…

Blogger Integrity: Writing for Yourself and Not for Attention

We hear about journalistic integrity, but what is blogger, or blogging integrity? Does it have a place in the online community?

In the age of internet and technology, everyone is fighting to be seen.

   I’m still new to the blogging arena. I’ve only been posting since January, still going strong with a few breaks every now and then, and in that time I’ve noticed something that goes completely unacknowledged by most. I’m talking about how often the success of a blog is defined, and exclusively defined, by the amount of viewers and followers it pulls in.

It’s possible that I’m not the only one, but I appear to go about my definition of success very differently. Yes, views and followers is ultimately the main goal, as it is for everyone. But I seem to have naturally avoided this common idea of success that pushes everyone to write more, and do more, for the approval of others and the goal to reach a wide audience. Instead, here is a list of things, a rubric of sorts, that I’ve caught myself judging success by:

1. Integrity. This is the biggest factor. I will not write something to get attention, or to get more followers. I only post something if I feel it is important, and if it resonates with a core truth. I state in my About Page that the goal of my blog is to be a pillar of authenticity amidst the shallowness portrayed by the media, and our every day lives. And that is what I’ll do. With this particular goal, I am very stubborn. I will die without admiration, or without a pile of worthless money, if it means I still have my integrity.

2. Commitment. Sure, every post is not perfect, or as good as the other, but I made an effort and have stuck with it for almost a year now. I think thats a good indication that I will in the foreseeable future as well.

3. Self improvement.  I’m not just talking about my writing. I’m talking about my confidence, and my creativity, which are unknowingly linked. I don’t often share what’s in my head. To most, my thoughts are foreign. They’re strange ideas that have no relation to a typical life. I go on philosophical rants, and have bouts of spiritual truths on a daily basis, probably more in one day than the standard person goes through for an entire year. For some, an entire lifetime. I can’t help it. Its who I am, and its my reality. Ive always kept these things inside trying to avoid being that person who thinks too deeply into things.

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 In a way, blogging has freed me. I don’t care about what others think anymore. If someone doesn’t like what I share, thats fine. They click onto the next thing, and thats the end of it. I’ve realized that even if someone were to attack me for my thoughts, its not worth placing limitations on myself, limitations that could severely sabotage my next idea or my next beautiful creation. Its not worth the risk, and I urge you, whoever is reading, to see it this way as well.

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 Even though I feel bombarded with blogs and other internet paraphernalia that is clearly meant for attention and appreciation alone, I still find many blogs with amazing insights, positive messages, and unique depth. There are blogs and media outlets that I follow with topics that I’m not even interested in, but because they are different and create what they want without caring how it looks, I am motivated and inspired by them.

Please let me know what you think! I am eager to hear what others have to say on this topic.

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I’m Back!

I have neglected this blog for the last few months as a chapter of my life was coming to a close, and a new one was opening. However, I have not been inactive during this time. Over the course of three months, I’ve managed to clean out my room in heaps (still an ongoing process) to make room for new changes. Of course, this warranted some redecorating.

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I’ve organized a writing meetup in my community, which is growing and evolving by the day. With this has come a new Facebook Page and personal writing goals.

   Ive taken upon myself to expand my knowledge of spiritual subjects and our reality through some carefully selected reading material:

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Lastly, even though this seems like its not the right time to start a new hobby with my overwhelming expanse of interests, I’ve taken up painting.

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All this while the beach beckons, and family members would like to see my face eventually.

I have neglected Metanoia in lieu of all these distractions, as well as finally being able to relax after a busy semester. Coming back to the routine of writing posts has been on my mind for the past few weeks, but I didn’t want to begin without a plan of action. I needed enough ideas and material to initiate another wave of thoughts worth sharing so that Metanoia wont fall into a pit of abandonment like many others in the wake of life’s obligations and distractions. I think much of it simply has to do with getting into the habit of pulling useful things out of apparent monotony. Like many bloggers, I am guilty of missing important ideas or messages that every day life has to offer. Why aren’t I mentioning the small breakthroughs I have during writing gatherings? Why aren’t I sharing insights from my reading or conversations with friends and family? I believe that adopting this awakened behavior is not only important for this forum, but for the sake of living. We’re constantly moving, only thinking about tomorrow, failing to reflect and allow lessons that come through – either big or small – to take form.

Some ideas that I’m planing on posting in the future include:

1. The Landscape of Metanoia

2. What is nothing?

3. Sweet Potato Egg Boat: A Review (a nice break from these sometimes intense topics)

4. Metanoia playlist

5. Must-haves for the spiritual pioneer

I urge anyone reading this to give me any suggestions on what they’d like to read on a blog like mine based on their interests, or things they wish they saw more of. I welcome you to comment below or send me an email:

numerologyfiend@gmx.com

I hope you all have a lovely week!

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Back to Me

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When I was 9, I would write stories about magical rings that washed ashore on beaches, unleashing unknown truths of magic onto the right person who found it. When I was 12, I wrote a story called Tetris, which was about how issues we come across in life sometimes do not fall in the most convenient way with their varying shapes and placements, creating a wall of clutter we thought could be avoided, but had little control over. When high school came there was no time for inspiration or creativity. The world of exams and applications meant there was one right answer and one wrong, and being wrong was the worst thing possible. I took to understanding the world instead, becoming very interested in sciences like biology, which satisfied my need to know how and why life is the way it is.

When I made it to 19, I was distraught from not ending up where I wanted to be despite my hard work and cooperation. School no longer satisfied my questions and tests brought more lies into my life. I began to retreat into my old self, which never really got turned off, but only turned down to a lower volume so that I could carry out what was asked of me.

I realized recently that my fourth-grade self was a lot braver than I am now, who used to read what she created to the class. I could never do anything like that today. Reluctantly, but self-willed, I would get up in front of the room after the encouragement from my beloved friend, Sam. I remember the rough illustrations of a far reaching imagination that littered the margins of my work. Even though I was uneasy, I knew my stories were interesting for a nine-year-old. They held the attention of a group of other nine-year-olds, which was an accomplishment worth noting. My teacher said something I never forgot, that everyone in the class should look for my name on books when we are adults, because I would probably publish some day. So despite my apprehensiveness, I felt good.

Now I am 21, and I want to feel good about the things that I do again. While I’m trying to focus on work and be productive, I find myself falling into random lapses of nostalgia in which I used to make jewelry and sell them at the beach. I fall back on pleasant memories of not just writing, but painting seashells, taking pictures, and fishing. I think this happens to everyone at some point in their life, but for someone who does not like to dwell on the past, it means something. It has been long enough that life’s obligations has pulled me away from this natural self, and I am making it a point to try and get back to it once this semester is over. I encourage anyone who has felt the same to make time for who we used to be before life told us what that was.

Created to Create

“Imagination is more powerful than knowledge”

-Albert Einstein

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In my own personal quest of understanding, I am encountering more and more often the idea of how our thoughts manifest into physical reality, and how we were created to create. This is true, and not necessarily on some mystical level that lacks rationality. We see it every day with our technologies. Our entire civilization is built on a foundation of things that were once ideas. It all had to be conceived first. Imagination is more important than knowledge because imagination manifests knowledge.

Think of a brick layer, whose tools, bricks and cement would represent knowledge, the facts that are at hand. These materials mean nothing if you don’t know what to do with them, just as facts are meaningless without a way to postulate scenarios. (I like this analogy because it also hints at the importance of the materials to build what we conceive, the role that knowledge plays in this scheme). Imagination gives knowledge shape, and therefore meaning.

All this, and yet our public schools are keen on teaching children how to think, and that the facts listed on a lecture slide in college is what will determine whether you are a functioning citizen. Perhaps this approach does make you a functioning citizen, but not in the way that is unique to yourself, not in a way that incorporates your own full potential.

I am writing this as a frustrated participant of this system. As a junior in college, I’m tired of the perpetual quest of trying to emulate what my external environment wants out of me, rather than simply drawing upon what I already know, working with what comes naturally, and applying it to our society in the most constructive way possible. I am weary of the idea that nothing is more important than making yourself into something that someone else wants.

So while we live in a civilization of such impressive creations, how is creating not given more weight in our external and internal lives? I suppose there could be a few answers to this, one major reason being money and greed. Our creations have been centric to this facet, virtually becoming a God of sorts, as it seems to be the reason we do anything today. We have to. Some of us create to earn a living, so we can eat food, to live and make more money, and so on. And so it is not about creating to create, but creating something that fits the status quo. This methodology ultimately leaks into the education system and the vicious cycle continues.

I understand that there is a reason why things are the way they are. I understand there are ideals that are simply not ready for our way of life, and that we have a long way to go towards a system that is morally sound and embraces humanity, rather than one that oppresses and controls it. However, I think there is still something we can take from these ideals, and although I’m not certain of how, I believe there are small ways to effect change.

I think it starts with waking up and realizing the distinction between our life’s purpose and our means of survival, because as humans, these things are completely separate and unrelated. It surprises me every day just how many people have forgotten that we have free will, and that we have a choice despite the constraints of our environment (which ironically, could potentially be eliminated with the realization of this fact). In many ways, we are a cog in the wheel. But I don’t believe we were meant to be cogs for this particular wheel, which is of control and prohibition. You have a choice to be what you want to be. To live your life like a song, a painting, poem, or an interesting novel, whatever suites your soul. And when you do this, something beautiful happens. Not just for yourself, but for those witnessing the change around you, who can then begin to believe that they too have this power, and they too can live life with greater purpose.

Our creations will change us, and how this happens is solely dependent on what we think is worthy of creation, either that of money or that of who we truly are at the core. This translates to the choice to keep living like we are living, or to live as we naturally came: created to create.

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 “When I say be creative, I don’t mean that you should all go become great painters and great poets. I simply mean let your life be a painting, let your life be a poem”

 -Osho